Calypso Monarch Finals 2008
Friday, February 8th, 2008 |Watching the Dimanche Gras calypso competition cemented something I realized last year: I still have no idea what judges are looking for. Every year I look at the competition and try to pick the winner and every year I’m left scratching my head at the results. I know it’s more than just lyrics. Melody and presentation are important, but the lyrics are the meat of the calypso. Let me give you my reaction to the performances beginning in last place.
15th Sekon Alves - When We Meet - Sekon’s song was about the way we as Trinbagonians speak about each other when we are among people of our own race.
I think this particularly resonated with me because it touched on a subject I had spoken on just after the November 5th elections, which was they way people in T&T act among people of their own race. I gave the example of what my aunt had said to me and how I had felt about it. Apparently many of you had similar experiences so maybe the song hit a chord with you too. Part of his lyrics went:
Could lift this country up or bring it right down.”
Honestly, at the beginning of the song I thought it was going to be yet another corny “Ganges meets the Nile” type song (particularly because he said “Ganges meets the Nile”), but it turned out to be much more than that and attacked the subject of race relations from a new angle. For a first appearance, I actually liked this song which is why I was incredibly disappointed with his last place finish. Obviously someone needs to come out last, but it shouldn’t have been Sekon.
14th Francine - The Irony -Goodness gracious, what a dull song and the thing just seemed to drag on forever. The premise is that she’s looking for a man to play iron for her band. So she puts an ad in the paper saying “Iron Wanted. She then uses the calypso to say what kind of iron she was looking for, nothing too long or too short. Said she: “Doh wah no dead iron in meh band”.
Obviously double entrende was at work (I know, like the word iron has never been used in that way before). What a yawnfest. She was accompanied on stage by a group of men playing their irons none of whom unfortunately hit her over the head with it…or me for that matter.
12th (tie) Crazy - A Positive Message - Let me start of by saying that 10 years from now nobody’s going to say, “Remember 10 years ago when Crazy sang ‘A Positive Message?’”. I’m pretty certain that this is going to be one of those songs that history forgets. Basically his calypso was a compilation of “positive messages” which turned out to be randomly spoken clichés - all lame, all hackneyed. Things like:
and
Believe it or not, I was bored out of my mind. The only time I started paying attention was when he said, ” It’s better to be courteous than outrageous”. I was like, “Crazy is that you?”. Besides the fact that the statement is completely out of character for Crazy, it doesn’t even make sense. “Courteous” and “outrageous” aren’t even opposites! I can’t believe Sekon Alves kept him out of last place.
12th (tie) Verstile - Shadow Reloaded - He dressed acted and sang like The Mighty Shadow. He was accompanied on stage by another man dressed as shadow who sat and wrote a song with a bassman (I assume) with a guitar standing over him. At some points Versatile seemed to sacrifice clarity for impersonation as I could barely make out what he was saying at times. Eventually Shadow himself joined him on stage and sang a little. The song was about….
11th Skatie - Reasons - Another forgettable calypso. At this point in the show I was glad that they were only doing one song this year. Because the crap I was listening to was the best they had. Skatie’s “reasons” were the reasons why T&T was in such a poor state which were, Ramesh was back, Gillian was on the “other side”, drugs coming into the country, Criminals with better guns than the police (wow, we’ve never heard that before). Goodness gracious, give us something new nah man, give us some insight. A bunch of warmed-over, exhausted statements isn’t artistic or entertaining. You’re the artist, for goodness’ sake. Yet another candidate for last place.
10th Singing Sandra - I Stand for Trinbago - In my eyes Sandra redeemed herself from last year’s offering “Sudan”. Actually she did more than redeem herself, I think she should have won. This was the song that I was looking forward to the most since first hearing it. In her song Sandra bemoans the state of calypso in T&T saying that it has been reduced to “picong on Panday’s and Oma’s bank account“. She said that the art was being prostituted and that calypsonians were rendering them blind and dumb despite the preponderance of ills overtaking the country like high food prices and crime. “There was a time when calypsonians were the true opposition,” adding, “T&T in crisis. Deal with the issues.” She also used a few props. There was a CSI crew walking about the stage picking up bodies and there were a group of people (calypsonians I assumed ) standing with their mouths covered with duct tape. At one point a barebacked youth walked out on stage with a young girl dressed in a red top. I couldn’t figure out what they were supposed to represent till she straddled him and they began dancing suggestively. Then it hit me! Danah and Akon. In my opinion, Sandra’s song was the best offering of the night because it was calling calypso back to what it used to and needs to be. It was fresh, meaningful and necessary. A lot of people have said calypso is losing its soul and it was good to see one of the big bards putting her neck out there to say what needed to be said. Tenth place was an insult.
8th (tie) Brian London - A Song for We - Brian’s song was basically a song about inclusion. The premise was that during a walk through Port of Spain he met people of various ethnic groups, who upon realizing that he was that calypsonian Brian London, poured out their frustration to him. An Indian man was frustrated at how he was treated in calypsoes every year. An African youth was frustrated at the label that places that Lavantille got from other Trinis. A Chinese man was mad that when the PNM was in power, Africans would say “We in power” and when the UNC was in Opposition, Indians would say “We in Opposition” leaving him feeling as though he didn’t belong. A Syrian man was frustrated that although he worked hard for what he had, Trinis always thought of him as a big time drug importer. You get the point… So each of these people asked Brian to “sing a song for we”. It was quite inspired in my opinion. One problem I had with him was that he didn’t really seem to sing all that much. His delivery was a little choppy. It was a good song, but not great so he placed just about where I expected him to….but not above Sandra.
8th (tie) Kurt Allen - Last Bad John of Kaiso - Perhaps Kurt Allen had the best presentation of anyone else that night. My boy was dressed to the T in (what I assume to be) his 1940’s getup. Kurt’s premise was than there were no Bad Johns again in Kaiso since they got caught up in political campaign, since they endure so much abuse and exploitation in the business - basically Allen is saying that calypsonians have grown soft. He said if there were true Bad John’s left there would be music pirates walking around with “legs made out of ply“. I liked his song. But like Brian London’s song, it was good, not great and he placed about where I expected him to….but not above Sandra.
7th Lesley Ann Ellis - Our Nation’s Heroes - A lot of fanfare went into this song about Trinbago’s heroes (Brian Lara, Dwight Yorke, A.N.R. Robinson etc.). Accompanying her on stage were a few of those heroes as well as a few subs with enlarged head shots for those who couldn’t be present. Her mother was also present - brought on by a car that drove on stage. It wasn’t a horrible song, but at the end I was wondering, “So what?” There wasn’t really much to it. I mean, it was a song about our nation’s heroes, so it wasn’t really groundbreaking. Aditionally, there wasn’t anything fresh about it. She didn’t really offer anything new. It bored me half to death.
6th Taylor - Sorry - Taylor’s song was in the form of a eulogy to his dead song. Part of the chorus went:
I should have told you everything comes with a price,
He who lives by the gun, by the gun he will die,
How yuh make yuh bed yuh sure to lie.”
A good song, but I wasn’t very entertained. I was a little surprised to see him in 6th place though.
5th The Might Chalkdust - Joan of Arts - Although I heard every word of this calypso, I’m still a little confused by it. The Joan of Arts title was a play on the name and title of former Minsiter of Culture Joan Yuille-Williams. Evidently we weren’t supposed to draw any parallels between her and Joan of Ark since Joan of Arc’s “martyrdom” resembled nothing in Joan Yuille Williams deeds. Chalkie was sining about the “freeness” that went on during Williams’ reign saying “I know all the fun and lahooray woulda done someday“. Adding that many artists received a cacada from her whether they “wuk or eh wuk”. Either he was criticising her for the handouts, or the artists for relying on them. I’m not sure which was true. Accompanying him on stage were “representatives” from TUCO, Pastor Cuffie, Pan Trinbago and the NCBA among others. If I had to guess, I’d say he was taking aim at all of JYW’s pets…but I’m still not positive.
4th Stinger - Voices from the Van - Although I enjoyed this one, it placed a lot higher than I would have guessed. It was amusing and engrossing, but to me it lacked depth. Stinger sings about walking past a prison van one day hearing the imprisioned speaking to their mothers through the gratings. He heard them asking for boxer shorts, jockey shorts, Bibles, writing paper. Unfortunately that was the entire calypso. The 4th best song this year? I don’t think so.
3rd Karene Asche - The Recipe - Karene sings a song about how to make a politician. I admit that I tuned this one out after the first verse because I was unimpressed. These recipe things are so hackneyed I didn’t really feel like sitting through it. Add a pinch of dishonesty etc, wow, original. Maybe I should have listened to it in its entirety, but judging from what the judges seemed to like, I don’t know if that would have helped.
2nd Cro Cro - Respect the Fourth King King - Maybe I would have given him an award for sporting the first muffhawk in competition history, but I wouldn’t have awarded him second. The fact that I don’t care for him probably had some bearing, but the song was a little crappy if you ask me. Basically he was asking for respect since he was the fourth king king. It’s not so difficult to detect his double enrtrende if you say if fast enough. He also managed to take some shots at Sugar Aloes.
I alone does go home and she my tears”
Yeah.
Ahead of Sandra? Seriously?
1st Sugar Aloes – Reflections – I don’t really care for Aloes either but this was a decent song. I figured the judges would have placed him first. His song punctuated with the refrain, “Here’s looking at you” was an attempt to highlight the hypocrisy in the sayings of notable people in society. After each chiding, one of Aloes’ helpers turned a mirror around each with a photo of the person attached to it. Five people were mentioned in all. Panday, Ramesh Lawrence Maharaj, Mervyn Assam and Carlos John and Cro Cro. Cro Cro’s mirror however supported a picture of a fish with the words “Stewed Cro Cro” written above it. It was ok I guess. He returned fire back at Cro Cro. Pretty entertaining and what not.
Overall? Meh. A few bright spots, but very dim. For all the trouble we are going through, it’s amazing how absent criticism of the government was - save Sandra.
I think my problem is that I tend to look for songs that resonate with me or that have some deep meaning behind it. Whether the tone of the song is serious or jovial, I feel they that it should have a message behind it - something for the listeners to take away with them when the show is over. That idea probably isn’t popular among judges. Because how songs as flat as “Respect the Fourth King King” and “Voices from the Van could place so high, is a mystery to me.
